| New Artist produced by the
All Electric Kitchen
Introducing the band Fat Fuck. And their debut album CUNT. In stores no time soon.
This is a band I'm producing (cough cough) Hopefully some of the most evil music on the planet. This is just a preview. The band is so secret that even I don't know who they actually are. The only way we could think of getting them out there is by doing some 3D rendering.
"We expect sales to be zero and interest to be even less. We're only doing it as an antidote to a fucked up, shitty, pathetic world full of hairless apes with no talent, no brains and all the sex apeal of a malignant melanoma." Said Mr. Fat Fuck himself at a recent terrorist convention.
He went on to say that "I hope little tiny terrorists strap little tiny bombs to all your genitalia and wipe out viagra sales for good."
"The only person who actually likes us at the moment is George Bush. And then only because he thinks we're right wing and Christian enough to be his friend. That cunt is a total woos bag compared to us. We would have nuked the entire Middle East. Then sit back and watch the fuckers trying to dig the oil out without frying themselves."
These are not nice people and I'm glad I don't know them personally. Great musicians though.
OK THE REAL DEAL
It came to me the other day what I need to do to get out of this malase. I need a new band. I'm an angry fat fuck so what else would I call it? And with an name like "Fat Fuck" what else would you call the album. "CUNT" of course.
Actually I'd been tossing up about the name for some time. Either "Fat Fuck" or "Idiot Savant". Fat Fuck won the toss the other night as I strugled with the concept of sleep, but I also thought. "Why not have both?" Idiot can be for the more "easy listening" noise.
The 3D model of me I'd been working on off and on for some time. Ironically it never really looked like me until I tried to make it super fat. Even then I couldn't make it look any fatter without the geometry falling apart. The render is a composit. The model was still done in Poser and hasn't been exported yet. I simply put this over a pre-existing test render then dicked with it a bit to make it de-fringe. I should be able to tweak the model better in a REAL 3D package but it's still a bitch to set up all the bones and stuff. I hate doing that.
The two cover shots were done in a real hurry. I used google image search to find all the pictures of the cunts. Sorry about the nude Anne Coulter. I couldn't resist. The irony is that I wouldn't have included her at all except that on a whim I searched for the word "Cunt" and her photo was about 6 down on the first page.
NOW THE TRICKY PART: The Music.
I can't sing myself any more since surgery fucked up my voice. This is a really piss off and has been a major source of depression these past 8 years. It's like my life stopped. Except for the pain, the persecution and general torment. So apart from anything else I need a vocalist.
Not just any vocalist but are real angry evil fuck. What I really want is a female version of Marilyn Manson. Preferably young, sexy and prepared to slash people's face up with a broken beer bottle at the slightest provocation. And of course, has an angry evil voice to match her angry evil personality. I often thought it would be interesting to have a female version of Manson. Someone who attracts teenage record buyers like a magnet but wouldn't piss on them should they be on fire.
Of course, I'll be disappointed and take what I can get. If anyone. So we'll see how fucked up this latest clue gets.
And there's one other small hurdle. After 4 years, I'll have to try and put my studio back together and make it work as best I can. What a fuck. Specially since it all ground to a halt after I got ripped off by Derringers. But that's another story. And with being constantly badgered by a woman with less brains that a crocodile and just about as much violence, not to mention a government and other institutions which would love to see my disabled ass dead and buried, this isn't going to be easy. But that's what you get from a bunch of cunts.
So if you're reading this and know anyone who fits the bill, let me know. Otherwise, as Fat Fuck himself would say... "FUCK OFF"
Click here to see the rear cover.
Never afraid to show his face, this is Mr Fat Fuck himself. More Band photos coming.